…in the Little Viking House.
Where has the time gone? Two weeks old already?!
This week has actually felt quite long, as Lovely Boyfriend and I work out how Little Viking works best. He’s doing pretty well on a routine, although I know many people disagree with babies and routines.
Everything I read says feed on demand, cuddle and soothe at every moment and, my favourite, you can’t spoil a baby. Maybe not, but you can teach them bad habits REALLY quickly! It would be sooooo easy to cuddle Little Viking to sleep in the afternoons when he’s grumpy before bed. But then I’d never be able to put him down between 5 and 7 without a bit of crying (sometimes a LOT of crying). So then I have to carry him every day for those two hours. Then he decides it’s comfy and wants to be held at other times of the day too…and where do you stop?
So we have a routine and we stick with certain ideas about when to allow our Little Viking to cry for 5-10 minutes before acting. He’s thriving on it and I get to carry out such luxuries as eating dinner at a reasonable hour, and sleep for more than an hour at a time overnight. In fact, even though last night was a “bad” night, because he woke earlier than expected, I was still only woken at 2.15 and 6.20 am. A good night (around 10 of them so far) is when he wakes between 3 and 4, and then I wake him at 7. Sleep is important and we’re all getting what we need in order to remain functional and happy.
I didn’t know where I was going with this blog when I started; I had no plans to write a defence of routines but that’s apparently where my mind is at this morning.
I like routine. My BPD thinks it needs routine to keep anxiety at bay. Certainly, I don’t cope particularly well when plans change or things don’t happen as I expected them to. That makes parenting a real potential minefield, because when do babies ever do what’s expected of them? Well, when you gently guide them into a routine…
I really noticed a drop in my mood on the one night last week where his routine really did go to pot (a kindly meant action by his Viking Granny – giving him a small feed at the wrong time – led to a disrupted night for us all). Not helped by the baby blues hormones of day 10, Lovely Boyfriend had to comfort a crying baby AND a crying Mum at 2 am. Thankfully my hormones died away and I didn’t have to resort to medication (not that I won’t go down that route if it turns out to be necessary). I gave the CMHT a quick ring and took their advice (the same as that given by Lovely Boyfriend) to reframe my thoughts and expectations. I’m still rather pessimistic in my outlook on how things will be if he starts crying (I.e. he won’t stop/ he probably has a milk intolerance), but I’m not as bad as I could be. I hadn’t quite realised how traumatised I was by Minimus and all her health problems as a baby (reflux and various intolerances). It’s something I’ll work on with my CPN when she gets back from holiday. For now I just remind myself that Little Viking is a different baby and, actually, is quite reasonable and content for much of the time.
In other, lighter news, my Little Viking has decided that air is a precious commodity which must be hoarded at any cost. I appreciate boys will be boys and I’m going to have to get used to a certain amount of farting and belching in the future, but seriously?! I think my wee man could set up as his very own wind farm at this rate! The donkey noises he makes as he drinks his milk are also incredibly amusing…
Grumpy face getting winded!